Red Moonlight
by xx.aesthetic
Summary: “Don’t you get it? I’m hypersexual! All I want you to do is throw me on your bed and ravish me senseless!” *ShikaIno*


Authoress' Note: Sorry, my seventh grade science class is getting really involved in astronomy — it's our new unit. And frankly, I'm getting so interested in it that my head is going to explode…

This is just to vent… XD

Ahou: idiot (very impolite/rude)

Just so you know, this story basically has no plot and just rambles on about trivial things. Sorry. Crackish!

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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, or the moon, or Earth, or Mars, or… you get the point. The universe does not belong to me.

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Red Moonlight

"Get your lazy ass up these stairs now!" The blond woman yelled at her teammate who decided to take his sweet, sweet time climbing the steps of the apartment building. She glared impatiently as he sluggishly reached for the wooden banister, gripping it tightly with his hand. "You're just being slow because I want you to be fast, ne?! That's it isn't it?!"

One step at a time, with feet that felt as heavy as one-thousand ton anvils, the distance between him and the landing Ino stood on decreased just slightly, but hardly enough to mollify her. "I can't go any faster. I'm lethargic — which was you're fault in the first place for waking me up at four a.m. in the damn morning — and with any sudden movement I could die."

Ino honestly didn't appreciate his sour humor at all. No human being on Earth would die from lethargy. The way he _could_ die was falling down the stairs, the _cause _being lethargy. There was a huge difference… obviously.

Shikamaru paused and exhaled. "This is such a drag…" His back arched a bit, feeling an aching pain.

"Y'know, finally, I think it's _you _that's being troublesome as of now." The girl tapped her foot irritably. To accompany the sign of displeasure, she folded her arms below her chest. "Can you please hurry? If not, then pass me the keys so I can let myself in."

He groaned, but reached into his pocket nonetheless. The keys were flung her way. "Now leave me alone, will you?"

"_Arigato_," she sang joyfully, inserting the key into the doorknob. In a matter of keen seconds, she had the door open, and rushed inside it.

Shikamaru only watched with droopy eyelids, continuing his trek up the deathly silent stairwell. One step took an entire two minutes, and in about thirty minutes, he was proud to say that he had walked fifteen steps in _thirty_ whole minutes. Nice…

The shirker stretched his arms when he finally reached the landing, emitting a throaty yawn. As he prepared to enter his shadowy apartment, much to his vexation, a freezing cold liquid was flung in his face.

Although he was shivering cold, his senses were once again as sharp as a butcher knife. However, that did not displace his dissatisfaction. "What the hell was that for?!"

"Gomen nasai," the blonde florist said simply. She grabbed his arm and pulled him inside, shutting the door behind him and flicking on the lights. "You wouldn't stay alert, so I had to do something. After all, it'd be useless to watch it alone." She disappeared down the hallway for a slight second, before reentering the living room with a green towel. The woman threw it on his head, drying him off. "It's like an unwritten rule for lovers to watch it together."

Underneath the cloth, the shirker's cheeks became a soft pink. "We're not lovers. Stop saying that."

He never really could understand why whenever they were together, she would refer to them as 'lovers' or 'the ideal troublesome duo' instead of just 'us' or 'we.' And that was saying something, seeing as how they were together every single hour of the day. Shikamaru and Ino had literally become one.

Ino smiled, and continued to dry his face. "Just you wait, one day we will be lovers. That day, it'll officially become known that Nara Shikamaru has overcome his lengthy denial," the girl stated, content with the possibility.

"In denial of something that doesn't exist? That's humanly impossible," he said spitefully, taking the towel in his own hand and out of hers, dragging the item from his head. He then repeated, "We aren't lovers."

"Hai, it's okay; I won't argue with you Shikamaru-kun. Anyway, when you're done musing over our romantic relationship you can find me out on the balcony. Off the lights before you meet me too." She waited for no answer before heading over into his bedroom.

He could only grumble, sling the towel around his neck, and follow her directions: shutting off the lights and trailing her footsteps. It wasn't long before he joined her on the balcony, the mild night air almost invigorating.

The male was somewhat amazed that she seemed so enthusiastic to watch the lunar eclipse. For once, he put his laziness to a rest and became inquisitive. "And the reason for your eagerness to watch pitch blackness is…?"

She frowned at his question. "The same reason why you watch those snowy fluffy things in the vast blue clearness we call a sky. That's why."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "You want to be a star?"

Ino shook her head in the negative. "A supernova maybe. They're explosions of stars, but the colors of their gases are just beautifully iridescent." She knitted her brows immediately after the statement — what on Earth (or space) did _that_ mean? She pushed the thought aside momentarily, and assumed it made her sound intelligent. She continued, "Unlike the clouds you love so much, lunar eclipses only occur a few times during the year. Like a minimum of two or something."

"You're acting as though you've got it worse than me. It _does_ rain sometimes. Those are the days where there's overcast — I'm not in favor of watching a grey sky," he appeared to be arguing this fact.

The blonde turned her head away haughtily, directing her eyes at the millions of flickering stars in the night sky. "Okay, so you have your thing, and I have mine. Let's keep it that way and not squabble over it."

Shikamaru muttered, "You'd be the one arguing."

"Shut up will you?! For a lazy shinobi you seem to spend a lot of time exerting energy by bickering over stupid things." She then mused, almost bewildered at the irony of it all.

The male sighed, scratching the side of his head in a bored manner. Digressing on the current situation, he went on about her fascination with the lunar eclipse. "When did you get so interested in astronomy?"

"When did you start asking so many questions?"

"This is pointless," he muttered to himself. "Fine — I don't care anymore. I'm going to bed."

"About the same time Sasuke left," she said under her breath, and it had successfully stopped him. Ino gripped the metal railing nervously, as she had never told anyone this before. "When I learned that he left, with all my naïveté, I thought I was depressed — a stupid kid like me had no idea what depression was. Anyways, while I was so wistful, I spared one glance at the red moon, and was hooked instantly. It may have been that I was just trying to find an excuse to forget about Sasuke, but there was a genuine interest."

"Heh, nice story," the male said sarcastically, and took his place beside her once more. "But if you're so genuinely interested in it, then tell me something I would never know about it. The moon, I mean."

She sighed helplessly at the question, "Tch, no problem." Ino rolled her eyes. "Well, for one, lunar eclipses only occur during full moon phases. They're caused when the moon passes into Earth's umbra, and reflects light from the sun. Get it?"

"If I was a beginner, do you think I'd be able to understand that? Though, it is impressive."

"You're so stupid! An umbra is an area of complete shadow caused by light from all points of a source being prevented from reaching the area! Do you get it _now_?"

"Hm," he rubbed his chin with his fingers thoughtfully. "Alright, now tell me why the moon gives of light."

"Dumbass," she muttered. Any sane human would know that Shikamaru wasn't _that _oblivious. In fact, he wasn't at all; he was a complete genius, no matter how much it appeared otherwise. "I just told you, the moon doesn't give off light. It reflects the light from the sun. Now stop questioning me, okay?! I know all there is to know about the moon, so just take my word for it!"

"Alright, geez. You always complain about how you want me to be more talkative, and now this? Make up your mind woman."

Ino ignored his comment, smiling widely and pointed toward the dark sky. "Nee, Shika-kun shut up! _Look_, it's happening!"

His eyes lazily found the bright moon, the side slowly becoming a scarlet color. He scowled, and stared at her twinkling eyes in disbelief. _What the hell is so interesting about this crap? _The male rolled his eyes and turned away. "Oh joy. How beautiful. Have fun."

"Wait baka!" Ino gripped his wrist with both her hands, forcing him to halt. He glanced over his shoulder exasperatedly. "This is the best part! You can't leave now!"

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean 'the best part'? It'll last for like two hours."

The blonde sighed, "The kiss! It's time for the kiss, baka!"

"Who? Me, kiss you?" He tugged his wrist away, cheeks burning pink. "I'm not kissing you."

"I know! That's why you have to _now_! It's only like, every girl's _**dream** _to share a moment of affectionate passion with her one and only true lover during a natural phenomenon!" She noticed how he groaned at the word, but continued nonetheless, "Now, kiss me you fool." The girl spread her arms out, waiting to accept his body.

He eyed her up and down as if she were out of her mind. Eyes closed, arms out wide, lips pursed slightly, she really did look ridiculous.

She cracked an eye open. When she knew he made no plans to make a move, she stomped frustrated and threw her hands on her hips. "_What _do you think you're doing staring at me like a fool?! Ahou, do it already!"

"Leave me alone…" he muttered in something he had intended to sound like disdain. The male kept his back to her, primarily to hide his traitorous blush. It always _had_ been one of his deep dark secrets to kiss her (he didn't like her, or anything; he was just rather… curious about her taste), but he knew that if he ever did get the chance, _she_ would be completely unsuspecting. Not the other way around. "I don't want to do it, so get over yourself."

"Nani? Get over myself you say? I don't wanna!" She complained, knitting her brows. But then again, there was a possibility, one she couldn't fathom, that he _didn't _want to. Perhaps she had misinterpreted his feelings toward her all these years. Ino's face softened to a degree before she muttered, "Gomen nasai… but, it _is_ my dream…" She said with mock hurt.

"Oh, really?" He questioned, facing her for the last time that night. Her schemes were something he'd grown aware of over the years, and would not fall for one again. "Please, enlighten me."

"Hai," she agreed. Ino placed a slender finger on her supple lips in silent contemplation. The girl turned away from him and placed her hands on the cool metal railing once more. "No matter what you believe Shikamaru-kun, I really do want to be kissed tonight." She sighed in mild content. "Just one simple kiss, a fleeting one… No strings attached… One that'll make me go weak in the knees… One that causes me to feel like I'm walking on air and no one else matters. No one but me and the guy that makes me blissful…"

Shikamaru snorted — this was suppose to win him over?

"No one but me and… Sasuke-kun."

Shikamaru was certain that something far in the atmosphere shattered at the words. He stared at her incredulously and (no matter how much he hated to admit it) loathed the male as of now.

He grumbled, "Don't talk about him around me."

The woman ignored his words, "I can just imagine it now. I'll run to him tearfully, sobbing about how I was rejected by a shirking disobedient ass that refused to kiss me like I wanted— " Shikamaru's jaw tightened at that. "— and he'll sweep me up in a loving, soothing embrace. After that, with his rough hand, he'll take my chin in his palm, drinking in my beauty and clearing my tears way. Then, we'll share a hungry, passionate kiss… He'll lead me to his bedroom, all the while leaving teasing kisses on my neck, before stripping m— "

Shikamaru interrupted, "Then go and see the stupid bastard and stop talking to me about it." The harshness in his tone honestly wasn't intentional, but he was just about fed up with hearing how 'great' Sasuke supposedly was.

The same male that _betrayed_ his own village…

Before Ino could even register what had happened, she was alone on the balcony. It wasn't her fault. She _hated_ using Sasuke against him, but Shikamaru was overmuch stubborn to realize that the sexual tension between them desperately needed to be eased. Bringing up Sasuke at times helped, but the most she was always able to get out of him afterward was a mere _stolen_ hug.

She needed _more_.

The sighed helplessly, and immediately knew this was just another one of his silent hissy fits. _Though, he is really cute when upset. Not that I'd do it on purpose, or anything._

"Stop right there Mr. I'm-So-Jealous-But-Won't-Admit-It-Because-It Goes-Against-My-Stupid-Macho-Man-Theory!" It was a mouth full, but had to be said nonetheless.

The shit was about to hit the fan.

Chest puffed, determination unwavering, she stormed in the room after him. With strength Ino didn't even know she had, she managed to force him to face her. The women grabbed both his shoulders. "What is the matter with you?! You act jealous and then… nothing! If you hate Sasuke so much, then show me! No, show everyone! Be possessive over me! Make me yours! Shove me against the wall and kiss me with wild lust!"

His expression was unreadable. It looked as though he was confused, angered, amused, and depressed all at the same time. A crease in the male's brow, he glanced down at both her arms. When the hell had her grip become so tight?

"Well?! Say something! For Kami-sama's sake Shikamaru, anything! Or better yet, _do_ something!"

"Look," Shikamaru shook his shoulders free. "I'm not exactly sure what the hell got into you— "

"Love! Love got into me! And sexual desire so strong I think I could break into an orgasm at this very second! Don't you get it?! I'm hypersexual! All I want you to do is throw me on your bed and ravish me senseless! The only thing I need to get into me right now is _you_ Shikamaru!"

Oh… wow.

Shikamaru could not believe the words that had come out of her mouth. "Do _you_ even know what you just said? Because…" He trailed off as an intense red spread across his cheeks. _Crazy bitch…_

"Yes, I do! And if something doesn't happen between you and I tonight, then I _will_ aim for Sasuke!"

"You won't…" it was more of a command than anything else. He refused to lose out to the traitorous male. He just wouldn't…

"I will!"

"You won't I said!"

"Just shut up and take me!"

And he did. Ino was his, and if demonstratingitmeant her staying with him, then it was just fine with him.

Shikamaru grabbed her waist and pulled her so close that thee was literally nothing but sexually aroused heat between them. Ino went at his lips furiously, kissing with mad fervor. Lustful beasts that they were, they tore at any part of the other they could get to.

Soon, in a mass of tangled limbs, both hopeless romantics fell backwards onto the bed. The shirker, breathing heavily, placed his hand lightly on her delicate cheek. He stared into her twinkling azure eyes loathingly, cursing that her words had such an effect on him.

"Ino, you are_ my _lover," he whispered, "Happy? I'm claiming you as mine. So forget about Sasuke."

She smiled, running her fingers on the nape of his neck. "Tonight, let it be known that Nara Shikamaru has overcome his lengthy denial… finally."

Drenched in an elegant red, amorous moonlight, all carnal frustrations became nonexistent after that night.

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**_Owari_**

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_'Love! Love got into me! And sexual desire so strong I think I could break into an orgasm at this very second! Don't you get it?! I'm hypersexual! All I want you to do is throw me on your bed and ravish me senseless! The only thing I need to get into me right now is _you_ Shikamaru!'_

Authoress Note: Those just may be my favorite words out of all the fanfictions I've written just far… Heh. Review ya old whippersnapper! Sorry, sorry! I was just kidding!


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